"How much sense does it make to have an English speaking Catholic Mission here in Munich, Germany? Does that not prevent English-speaking people from integrating into the German parishes? At best the members in there should stay only a limited amount of time. And as to the Germans who go there, this is more a psychological thing: it satisfies some of their needs to go there. In no case, however, a spiritual reason can be brought up by Germans to attend an English-speaking mission in their own country."Is that right?
I am German. And I attend St. Kilian – the English-speaking Catholic Mission in Munich, Germany. Am I having a psychological problem? Not more than most of the rest of you guys I’d say. Does it fulfill some of my inner needs? Of course it does – that’s what a Church is for! If a Church doesn’t satisfy the needs of its members, something is wrong with this Church! Can no spiritual reason be brought up as grounds for me to go there? Am I preventing others or myself from integrating into the German parishes? Well, isn’t that some sort of spiritual pride to argue like that? And maybe a little narrow-minded?
First some about myself:
I am a cradle Catholic. Born in a small town in Northern Bavaria, I grew up very traditionally. Looking back at that I am deeply grateful that the Lord granted me this.
The pre-Vatican II time was still very much alive when I started off as an altar boy. Also lots of old traditions where still cherished and shaped me in a way that took decades to come to full bloom.
However, my life took a different turn and soon I was heavenly involved with Anarchists and later on spent many years fully embracing the gay life – in a way that most of you guys probably cannot even imagine. And I am not proud of that at all.
Don’t mistake me – I do not see my life as all bad. It has shaped me into the man I am now.
It took many years till the Lord probably couldn’t see me going down anymore (I guess it couldn’t also go more down than it was back then). He answered my prayers – the first ones in years – and in His immeasurable grace brought people into my life that He used to change my life: North American Christians.
That might sound strange to some of you, but take it from me: they literally saved my life. I would probably be dead by now if it hadn’t been for them – or better: for the Lord in and through them.
Then another journey started: I was asked to attend a Christian service once a week, pray and read the Bible on a daily basis. Now as to the praying and reading the Bible part I got that alright, but when it came to the service, I was hesitant. I hadn’t been in a church service for a long, long time. Not knowing better, I went to the next church around the corner. A typical German big city parish I’d say. I attended mass and went back home. And I went like I entered: alone. Completely anonymous. The mass wasn’t “bad” - it still was a mass. But as to myself, I felt like a complete outsider. That was nobody’s fault but my own, but the whole ceremony and also the sermon felt like something I was not a part of. This was a subjective feeling, but it led me into seeking for greener pastures.
I shared my experiences with the guys online (I was part of a Christian online recovery group) who were mostly Americans or Canadians. One suggested for me to go to reborn Christians.
Reborn what?
All I knew was the Catholics and the Lutherans. Anyway – why not give it a try?
I checked out an English speaking Baptist church downtown. Somehow I was more drawn to them than to the German Baptist community that was in the same building.
What am I supposed to say? There I found Christians that showed me that the Christian Faith was way more than what I knew. That it was something that went to the heart, that was to be lived out 24/7, that you share with your brothers and sisters. We prayed together, had Bible studies together, soon I joined the worshipping band and took part in the many church activities. A lady from the church took the time and effort to sit with me on a regular basis, read the Bible with me and re-introduce me to the Christian Faith – in a way I hadn’t know before.
Even though my journey took me to other churches (I spent another three years in the local Church of Christ), I am still in contact with them and also with the guys who the Lord used to bring me back to Him. I am deeply thankful to all of them. They were the ones who set my heart on fire for the Lord and I will not forget that till the end of my days.
It took a long time, lots of Bible studies and most of all a lot of time spent with Capuchin friars till I found my way back home to Rome. Back to the Catholic Church.
Like most who come back or convert and have been with the Evangelicals or Fundamentalists before, I was on fire for the Lord. I loved Him more than anything in my life. I loved the Bible and I wanted to live out my Faith.
And then you come back home to the Catholics. You guys probably won’t realize, but for us this is like one big cold shower. Like you’ve come to know and love the Catholic Church in her fullness – to find out that this Church hardly seems to exist anymore and that most of its members don’t even seem to realize the treasure they have.
I checked out St. Kilian, the English-speaking Catholic mission and to this day I believe the Lord led me here. This is the perfect transition for someone coming from free evangelical or fundamentalist churches. There you also find the socializing, the potlucks and the many activities that are already familiar to you. Plus a priest that is a true Shepard of his flock. In one word: you find family. Christian brothers and sisters.
Do not make the mistake to call that only a psychological thing. Of course, this environment also fulfills emotional and relational needs. But if you take a closer look on the Biblical view of man, you will find that the three parts of it (the body, mind and soul) are combined as one. You cannot see them separate and you cannot tear them apart. There is no such thing as “only” psychological” and “only” spiritual.
The Lord knew the need of man for fellowship. For this very reason he created Eve. For this reason He kept on reminding us that Faith is not just a private thing between Him and us, but always to be seen in the context of the Church. And the red threat that runs throughout the Bible is the Church as a family – with a Father, a Mother and brothers and sisters. A family based on a life-giving covenant with God. A contract exchanges property, but in a covenant you give yourself.
Keep that in mind when you think that the warmhearted Church family that you find in St. Kilian is only a psychological thing. That would mean you completely miss the point of the Christian family!
Now why would a German join the English-speaking mission?
Since some years I have been studying theology in a part-time Catholic study program. I just finished my two internships – one of them being in St. Kilian, the other in a German parish around the corner. Also I am still in contact with other German parishes, committees and Christian as well as non-Christian churches and religions. So I guess you could say I am not isolated nor do I further non-integration through my behavior or through the way I worship.
What I have found in St. Kilian is what I would in some sense call the future of the Catholic Church.
I do not see a conflict between foreign-speaking missions and the local German Church. It doesn’t have to be an “either / or”. It can and should be a “and”!
If you take a closer look at the Catholic Church today, you will inevitably realize the many changes going on there. Some for the better, some maybe not so good. However, changes are always the first step to growth – both in numbers, spiritually and as persons.
You find the tridentine mass being celebrated again, you find many new Catholic communities and orders, you find many laypeople using their God-given gifts to live out their Faith and you also find people leaving the Church because they have never experienced or understood what she really teaches and why she does so or theologians and laypeople re-defining the Bible and the Catholic Faith in a way that is spiritually destructive (read “Father Elijah” by Michael D. O’Brien for more!).
Maybe new forms of parishes (like St. Kilian) or new communities – and also “old” ways to celebrate the mass like the Latin rite celebrated in the tridentine mass in addition to the existing German parishes and under the guidance of the local Bishop could enrich the Catholic Church in Germany in a way the local German parishes could not.
Another point that should not be neglected (again read “Father Elijah” by Michael D. O’Brien for more!): there is also a theological aspect to that. There are people – also Germans! – attending English-speaking Catholic parishes, because they find the Catholic Church there.
What I mean with that?
In the last decades some sort of modernist theology has grown especially here in Germany that is very unhealthy for the Church. Now I do not want to put German theologians in general down, but all in all I rest my case. Traditional Catholic teachings are considered out of date and replaced by something I would in some cases have a hard time even calling Catholic (even though well-intentioned). Also there is more ecumenical activity going on in some German parishes than Catholic teaching, evangelizing and life. So even lots of Germans are drawn to American theologians and lay evangelists like Prof. Dr. Scott Hahn, Tim Staples, Fr. Bill Casey, Jeff Cavins, Steve Ray, Bob Fishman, Dave Armstrong, Mike Cumbie, Jim Akin, Karl Keating and many more. First, their methods are a lot more helpful (easily understandable and solid teaching on CD’s, DVD’s, tracts, books and study guides as well as on the internet, in seminars and so on). Apologetics like they do it is considered completely out of date in German theology. However, coming from an evangelical and fundamentalist background, I can only warn you: you can only love what you know. It is not for nothing that many Catholics leave the Church because Evangelicals confront them with “one-liners” (Bible verses that seem to contradict Catholic teaching at first sight). That Atheism takes root. That unhealthy things are going on in German parishes, simply because people do not know what the Church teaches. That even in study programs things are being taught that go against traditional Catholic teaching. Bible verses are “explained away” and everything is seen in he light of modern science, human reason, psychotherapy and political correctness. All of that thrown into the ecumenical pool and out comes a wishy-washy cafeteria Catholicism, where you pick a little from here and some from there – all according to your personal preferences. Don’t get me wrong: ecumenical activities are a good thing, but they only work if all participants are firmly rooted in their own faiths. If you do not really know where you belong to and where you stand, you will not be able to fruitfully communicate with others either. As one Muslim said at a Christian-Muslim meeting after having heard different and sometimes completely opposite views from different Christians being present: “Well, what do you believe in?”
Back to the missions. Some might think that missions are only for Third World countries where people need to hear about Christ, where they do not know Him at all and are waiting for us to tell them about Him, where you evangelize and make converts (sounds pretty much like Europe to me, if you ask me). It goes way beyond that. On www.newadvent.org you find a great article on Catholic Parochial Missions. They are different from the evangelism of the Church among heretics and pagans. Catholic Parochial Missions are out to instruct Catholics (!) about their own religion. They also convert the sinners (guys like you and me) and set lukewarm benchwarmers on fire for the Lord. Does that ring a bell? It sure does for me.
Now that does not automatically refer to foreign-speaking missions, but it sure has its point. Catholic Parochial Missions usually do systematic courses and stuff like that – but does that mean they do not refer to and English-speaking mission in Munich, Germany? Not at all! On the contrary, this is what I see as the primary goal of our wonderful parish. Why not elevate this concept to a parish level?
This is also what might make us different from other parishes in Germany: As an English-speaking Church we are internationally oriented – in other words: CATHOLIC (universal). In a city like Munich with people from all over the world (some of them only here for a limited period of time!) you cannot just tell them go and learn German. You need to integrate into German parishes. Maybe the German parishes need to integrate a little bit more into the international community and not see their own language and tradition as the center of the universe. How about that. But we are here in Germany, you might respond. We sure are, but first every country is becoming more and more international and a little international and universal flavor doesn’t hurt anybody and second as I said some only stay for a short amount of time. Are they supposed to fist learn German and how we celebrate mass before they dare to set a foot into His Church? Isn’t that just a little bit arrogant? And even those who stay here for good: Shouldn’t we let the Church flourish in all Her different forms instead of trying to “Germanize” everything (remember: I am German!) and calling those who go to foreign-speaking missions people who prevent others from integrating into His Church? If I take a look on our lively, warmhearted community and the regular Church attendance on Sundays and compare that to the average German Churches in Munich, I really ask myself who is preventing whom from integrating (I am not blaming anybody. You cannot put the blame on anybody else but yourself if you don’t attend mass or leave the Church. However, the Church also has Her duties and a calling, which I sometimes have a hard time to discern).
Reaching out to atheists, to the marginalized, to Evangelicals, to the religions, to non-believers, to lukewarm Catholics, to those who attack the Church, to cafeteria Christianity and people out for moral relativism that does not know a common agreement on what is good and true but leaves this up to every individual to decide – seeing our international mission there, right among them, wouldn’t that be something for St. Kilian? Something a German parish would have a very hard time doing? Setting people on fire again for their own Faith, preparing them for the sacraments, teaching and sharing our own Faith to and with them, seeing our Christian calling as a personal 24/7 commitment to Christ and His Church? And all of that in an international setting?
We can be there where regular German parishes neither have the time nor means nor people to be. We can be active when others are caught up in daily routine. We can be what is lacking in a big city like Munich.
By the way: even if somebody only comes to us because we are English-speaking and he or she feels more at home here, why on earth should we not welcome him? Why should we tell him to go out, learn some German and go to the German parishes? Or see our parish community only as a sort of transitory project that offers English-speaking people masses only as long as they do not understand German? That would go against everything Christianity is all about and greatly and tragically miss the point: we are family. And a family is a covenant for life. You do not “use” a family and then move on to what you think is a better one. In our days, we should call ourselves happy to have people come to us at all. Would Jesus chase them away because they feel - both emotionally and spiritually! - more at home here? I don’t think so.
No, I most certainly don’t think so.
You might come up with smarty-pants theological essays now trying to justify a position that would redefine the word “mission” and the need to integrate into the local, national parishes. Again: we do not separate ourselves by what we are. On the contrary: we are probably more outgoing and our folks might be much more on fire for the Lord than any local German parish (just for the record: I do not want to put German parishes down. I am also active in one and lots of what they are doing is a great job for the Lord). With all those theological gymnastics you will not convince me that we are at best helpful for the shift and at worst useless and harmful. As I see things, people who try to find theological reasons to justify that are those who need to prayerfully reconsider their position.
“Therefore go and make disciples of all nations…and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you” (NIV) we read in the Great Commandment in Mt 28,19-20. Doesn’t “all nations” sound like a great mission concept for St. Kilian?
We are one family and one body of Christ. Every member of the body has its function and none is better or more important than the other. Even within the German Church you have a great variety of different communities, traditions and organizations. And this is a good thing! We should never force our own personal view of how the perfect Church has to look like. Dietrich Bonhoeffer wrote a great book about that: “Living Together”. The point is that you will never find that perfect Church – and if you do, you’ll ruin it the moment you enter its doors.
We are not a “German” Church. We are one, holy and apostolic Catholic Church. And international Church that should also be reflected like that in an international city like Munich.
Call me retarded, old school, harmful, full of psychological problems and needs – I don’t mind. I love my Church and I am not a bit ashamed of that.
Quite on the contrary: I will not put my light under the table, but shout it from the roofs:
God bless St. Kilian!
Munich, July 31stRobert GollwitzerKatholisch leben: The Jesus Brothers!www.katholisch-leben.orgJASON – a Christian ex-gay ministrywww.freewebs.com/jason-onlineMen’s Fraternity Germanywww.freewebs.com/mensfraternityP.S.: This paper is NOT meant to further division in the church or something. I see it as grounds to clarify my own (!) position, not to put anybody down.